Friends, I would like you to know that I am so dedicated to the cause of supporting local business that I am about to share with you my bra shopping story. A story that ordinarily should only be shared with girlfriends... and wine. But, for the sake of the cause, I will share it. Here. On the internet. Good thing I don't have a lot of readers!!
This summer, I went to I Am Woman , a lingerie store waaaaaaaaaay down Calgary Trail I tried to get there one morning on the LRT and ended up wandering around some strange south-side neighbourhood for a good 45 minutes trying to find my way to Calgary Trail. According to the evil masterminds behind the ETS Trip Planner, I should've been able to just jaunt there in 8 minutes. Not so. Anyway, the first visit was fine, once I found the place and I tried on a variety of options and was fitted by a really nice lady. I have had bra fittings done twice in my life and both times, they do not seem to as interested in cleavage as I am. They seem to be more interested in something that fits well and is supportive. So I ended up with something practical, instead of slutty, but ok. Every respectable woman should probably have a practical bra in her wardrobe... I'm sure Marilla Cuthbert and Rachel Lind didn't wear their push-up bras EVERY day, right? So I ordered my old lady, ahem, sensible, bra and then took a very expensive cab ride back to civilization because I was not letting ETS get the better of me again!
I went back to pick up my brassiere (that's what us elderly women call them...) last week and, as a last ditch effort for some cleavage, I asked the girls working that day what they would recommend. Well, they busted out (hee!) silicone inserts of various sizes and shapes, moulded cups, cups with padding, all kinds of stuff! Yes! This is what I'm talking about! So I tried on each and every one of those bras. Turns out, I am bosomly challenged. Not one of them created the look I was going for. It occurred to me that maybe the bra fitters knew something I didn't and were just too nice to tell me! So I left with my 19th century undergarment. Oh, but before that, I shared an awkward moment with the sales girl who said, in response to me saying I was just going to wear my new item out, "Do you want a bag to take your old (ill fitting, impractical, whoreish) bra home in?" And instead of saying, "no thanks," and leaving it at that, I said, "no thanks, I didn't wear one." Yep. I said that. And my old lady bra seemed to cringe a little at my lack of class. I even think I heard her wondering how on earth she got hooked up (hee!) with this chick! You can take the girl out of the Victoria's Secret (two sizes too small) push-up bra but you can't take the Victoria's Secret push-up bra out of the girl!
I went back to pick up my brassiere (that's what us elderly women call them...) last week and, as a last ditch effort for some cleavage, I asked the girls working that day what they would recommend. Well, they busted out (hee!) silicone inserts of various sizes and shapes, moulded cups, cups with padding, all kinds of stuff! Yes! This is what I'm talking about! So I tried on each and every one of those bras. Turns out, I am bosomly challenged. Not one of them created the look I was going for. It occurred to me that maybe the bra fitters knew something I didn't and were just too nice to tell me! So I left with my 19th century undergarment. Oh, but before that, I shared an awkward moment with the sales girl who said, in response to me saying I was just going to wear my new item out, "Do you want a bag to take your old (ill fitting, impractical, whoreish) bra home in?" And instead of saying, "no thanks," and leaving it at that, I said, "no thanks, I didn't wear one." Yep. I said that. And my old lady bra seemed to cringe a little at my lack of class. I even think I heard her wondering how on earth she got hooked up (hee!) with this chick! You can take the girl out of the Victoria's Secret (two sizes too small) push-up bra but you can't take the Victoria's Secret push-up bra out of the girl!
I give this posting a AA rating!
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